First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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