yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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