You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
