I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Randomize
