No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
