You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
