so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
