Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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