im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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