I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
