..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I take back everything I said about communal showers
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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