you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Randomize
