two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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