dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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