I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize