thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
