I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
