oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Randomize
