why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
