with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
