I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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