Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
