I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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