well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
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