I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
