She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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