i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Two words: nipple clamps
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