One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
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