Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
