you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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