Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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