I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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