dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
