We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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