Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize