I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
