No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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