Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Randomize
