I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
My breasts were aching with rage.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
