Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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