Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize
