Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
