Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
