Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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