Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
