uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
