I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Randomize
