i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
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