found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
