I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
