the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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